CD 40. Nothing going on. *Le sigh*

Several ladies (I'll link later - gotta get this down and get my butt out the door to work) have written stern letters to their ovaries calling them out for their insolent behavior, and I figured, what the heck - may as well give it a shot!

Alright ovaries. Listen up. I know I've whined a couple of times lately when my chart has suggested that you were actually getting your lazy asses out of bed each morning and doing your freakin' job. In doing so, I certainly didn't mean to suggest that I didn't *want* you to work, I just didn't want to be told that you were working when you were in fact lazing around on the couch watching Maury all darn day long! It's kind of like when you pay someone to paint your house, and then find out from your visiting niece that when you were at work and they didn't think anyone was watching, they went and spent a couple of hours in the neighbours pool. (True story! I was the niece!)

Okay, so I digress. This is getting ridiculous, my dear ovaries. 40 days, and the best you can do is tease me? Three patches of fertile cervical fluid, spotting, and a temp line that resembles the Rocky Mountains? Pathetic! If you were performing up to standard, I would have been over AF a week ago and be getting ready to O again! In fact, you should have produced 9 good eggs in the 8 and a half months since I started monitoring your activity, and you've only managed to put out 3! This is going to severely impact your performance bonus if you don't shape up.

Now, suck it up and get back to work!